Wednesday, February 17, 2016


Illness reigns supreme.
Son#2 had to be picked up from school after he vomited his lungs out.
With no tv, the barfing boy had to entertain himself - an impossible feat.
He cycled to school at 4 to go chuck objects onto the ice.

With the holiday last week, ill husband and kids (round#2 with stomach bugs), and not feeling fine and dandy much myself, I'm all cared out.
I need a morning/day/weeks to myself just to pull myself towards myself.

Tomorrow Son#3 will spend the afternoon in hospital to check his kidneys for defunct parts.
It doesn't end.
It. Does. Not. End.

Then the report came back from the so-called labour specialist, which, as expected, stated that I can happily work my full contract.
Feeling trapped much??

You know, it's not depression.
It's bloody frustration and dissatisfaction with the status quo.
No one said you had to like your life.
Which doesn't mean I'm ungrateful.
I could just do with no pain/less pain, more energy and a bundle of cash so I can do more of what I enjoy, and the freedom to choose what those things are.
True for all of mankind, methinks.
But tonight I feel like the seed trapped in soil.
The potential is there, but the conditions are poor.

A talk with Son#1's coach gave 2 valuable insights:

1. If something is going well, keep doing it. If not, then change it.
2. You have your whole life to determine who you are.

Wise words.


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