Monday, November 21, 2016

But I don't want to

This week will probably see the end of my career at the university, possibly stretching it another week.

And even though I know it is what I want (need!), I feel overcome by grief.
It is a profound loss, like a divorce.

I actually like my colleagues - I am surrounded by intelligence and humour, lots of kindness.
I used to think I would probably continue working there until I retired.
Things are very often different to one's expectations.
I have little control of the future, professionally and privately. 
And if anyone tells me to try to think in terms of opportunity as opposed to obstacle again, I may just very well smack them.

I need to wallow for a bit, mull and chew, see where all this fits in.
Then I'm sure I'll be able to buck up again.


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